Cross Fit

In a world that has gone all Toupee-sy Turvy, Jesus L’Oreal Christ returns once again from the call-centre in the sky with more untold stories, leg-warmers and wind-machines to promote his new fitness and well-being empire.

Join the dylsexic disco-dancing King of the Shoes as he inspires you to achieve your inner beauty by the Rivers of Babyliss or destroy your fatted calves doing the Pontius Pilates workout. With another high octane hour of song, dance and alternative facts, your saviour is on hand to help you cast the first stone. He’s not a prophet – he’s Pro-Fit!

★★★★ Three Weeks

★★★★ Arts Award Voice

‘Enough to make anyone proclaim Halleberrylujah’ ★★★★ The List

‘Exactly what a Summer Heights High production of ‘Jesus: The Musical’ would look like’ ★★★★ Scotsgay

‘Jesus brought the house down at my Club Cumming parties’ Alan Cumming

‘Made me close to hospitalisation with laughter’ Viv Groskop

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